Thank you, Paula, for welcoming
me on your blog today to share the inspiration behind my debut historical
romance, A Love Restored. A Love Restored
is based on my real-life romance with my husband, Mike, with all its ups and
downs, including our emotionally devastating break up. I chose to set the story
in the past because I’m a huge history geek.
In fact, it was Mike’s idea to
write our story. “Really?” I asked
over the rim of my readers, “because you don’t look so good in that story for a
very long time.” He smiled and kissed my forehead then responded, “yeah, but I
think it turned out all right.” I’d have to agree. We celebrated our 28th
wedding anniversary in June.
You see, I’ve struggled with
weight issues my entire life and that struggle plays an important part in our
story. I’ve had cruel things said about my appearance. Oftentimes by people who
were supposed to love me.
Boys
don’t date chubby girls.
With
those broad shoulders and hips, you wouldn’t be petite even if you lost weight.
You
have such a pretty face, what a shame you don’t do something about your figure.
Men don’t marry overweight women.
I guess people assume that as
your waistline expands so does your capacity to tolerate rudeness.
But their insensitive words
failed in comparison to the ugly way I spoke to myself.
You’re fat.
You’re ugly.
No one likes you.
No man…will
ever…love you.
I’d become so defined by the negative
comments and opinions of those surrounding me, I no longer saw anything to
esteem. I’d allowed my self-worth to be determined by a yardstick that measured
my value according to the size of my waist or the flatness of my stomach,
always coming up short.
I yearned for a love that
would look upon my heart and find inestimable worth, despite my physical flaws.
Couldn’t someone love and accept me the way I was? Like a needle caught in the
scratch of a vinyl record, the toxic phrases I spoke to myself played repeatedly
in my head. Why was it so hard to believe a man might find me attractive? Even
love me? No matter the exact phrasing, it all boiled down to the same thing in my
mind—I was undesirable, therefore unlovable.
The
Bible tells us in John 10:10 that “The
thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have
life and have it abundantly.”
Here
are just a few things the Bible has to say about you:
1 Thes.1:
4 You are chosen and dearly loved of
God.
Ps. 139:14
You are fearfully and wonderfully
made.
Zech. 2:8 You are the apple of God’s eyes. (I
just love that one!)
2 Cor.
5:17 You are a new creation in
Christ.
John 1:12 You are a child of God.
Col. 1:14 You have been forgiven.
Rom. 8:1 You are free forever from
condemnation.
Eph. 2:6 You are his masterpiece
My personal journey to
self-acceptance is shown through my heroine, Ruth Ann. But at its core, A Love Restored is not only a story of
love, romance, heartache and restoration, but also a story about the power of
words over our lives. It is a story about the struggle each of us faces to take
our thoughts captive to the truth of Scripture, so we may experience the
fullness of God’s unequivocal love for us. As Benjamin and Ruth Ann discover,
it is only then that we are truly able to give and receive love,
unconditionally.
I hope readers will be able to
relate to Ruth Ann’s struggle. Whether their issue is with their body image,
finances, appearance, lifestyle, occupation or something entirely different, my
prayer for each of you is that you will not allow the enemy to steal the joy
that is rightfully yours as a child of God. Speak the truth of the gospel over
yourself every day and ask God to give you His eyes to see yourself as He does. (1 Samuel 16:7b)
Your
Turn: What scripture speaks to your heart when the enemy whispers in your ear?
She was nothing like the woman he’d
envisioned for his bride, but he was everything she’d ever dreamed of—until a
promise from his past threatened their future.
With pert opinions and a less-than-perfect
figure, Ruth Ann Sutton doesn’t measure up to society’s vision of a perfect
lady. When she accepts a position teaching in a Freedman’s School, it threatens
the only marriage offer Ruth Ann is likely to receive. She’s forced to choose
between life as a lonely spinster or reinventing herself to secure a
respectable proposal.
Determined
to rise above his meager beginnings, Benjamin Coulter’s reputation as a fast
learner and hard worker earn him the opportunity to apprentice with a surveyor
for the railroad—a position that will garner the respect of other men. After a chance encounter with Ruth Ann Sutton,
Benjamin is smitten
with her pretty face, quick wit,
and feisty personality.
When
others ridicule his choice, will Benjamin listen to his heart or put ambition
first?
Kelly Goshorn weaves her affinity for
history and her passion for God into uplifting stories of love, faith and
family set in nineteenth century America. She is a member of American Christian
Fiction Writers and Romance Writers of America. Kelly has been enjoying her own
happily-ever-after with her husband and best friend, Mike, for 28 years.
Together they have raised three children, four cats, two dogs, a turtle, a
guinea pig, a gecko, and countless hamsters. Thankfully, not all at the same
time. When she is not writing, Kelly enjoys spending time with her young adult
children, scrapbooking with friends, board gaming with her husband, and
spoiling her Welsh corgi, Levi.
You can connect with Kelly on:
Thanks so much for sharing, Kelly!
Go ahead and add this to your To Be Read List - you know you just have to read it!
And share an answer to Kelly's question - What scripture speaks to you when the enemy is trying to speak louder to you?
Hi Paula! Thanks for having me today!
ReplyDeleteI love that writing the book was your husband's idea!
ReplyDeleteThanks. He enjoys taking credit for the idea! LOL!
DeleteThanks for sharing your struggles, Kelly. You are not alone in body image issues. I thoroughly enjoyed "A Love Restored." Ben (aka your hubby) did redeem himself in the end. Yay for romance.
ReplyDeleteBarb Britton (who can't seem to get out of unknown Google)
Hi Unknown Barb, (LOL)--I'm glad he redeemed himself in your eyes, he certainly did in mine! I think that was one of the scariest parts of writing our story--not knowing if people would stay with him while he worked through what may seem to be a shallow problem. We are all flawed. Finding a spouse is about finding one whose flaws you can live with. He has proven himself a Godly man over and over again. Now he greets with me "good morning, beautiful," every day!
DeleteA voice for the one who doesn't fit the culture's ideal size or appearance! Thankful God redeemed you and your marriage, Kelly, and equipped you with the courage to write about it.
ReplyDeleteThanks Mary. I never really thought of myself that way. Just hoping to make a difference in some small way! Thanks for that encouragement!
DeleteKelly, I can relate, my own FATHER body-shamed me, as we say today. Our culture has come a long way, and your fictional heroine's culture has come even further. I'm 67 and a HEALTHY size 12 to 16, depending on the cut of the garment. I look and feel just fine, but it took me a while to get here.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing. Can't wait to read the book.
Kathy Bailey
Oh, and it's your DEBUT, how exciting!
ReplyDeleteKB
Hi Kaybee, Thank you for your kind and understanding words! So true our heroines and our culture have come a long way.
DeleteThanks for sharing, Kelly. I loved learning your novel is based on your own story. During times of struggle, I love the verse in Zephaniah (3:17): "The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing."
ReplyDeleteHi Carol, I love that verse! What an encouragement! Thank you for sharing it with us!
Delete